Wednesday, November 30, 2005
#~ MeMorieS of you & me ~#
Darling~ hee, how r u? This sat is the COJ already, tat means i get to c u liao. Hee, Ooo cant wait for tat day.. Hmm, tho abit sad lah cos plan for over 100 children event. In the end, only abt 26 ..but nvm, we will still enjoy ourselves de =)
Hmm.. Darling~ today, i watched tat "Tong xin yuan II" , the domestic show.. There's a part which is very touching, think tats wat u wanna say to me... Leave everything to the past bah. Dun live in the past. Give myself a chance. Dun con't to yearn in the past. Till that part, watery eyes liao. Seems unable to control them.. Oh boy~ i feel as tho i'm that person, darling~ i dun wanna lose u... cant afford... Or prehaps it's not tat i cant let go, is that i nvr try to? I dunno... i dunno.. i only noe, my feelings for u is so strong.. i dunno y..
How i wish u by my side... to see u to sleep.. to see u the 1st thing in the morning when wakie.. I can give up almt everyth, jus not u..
I noe the feeling of being with a person u hav no chemistry with. Jus kinda weird bah. But prehaps, give each other time.. Dar~ hav u really think abt our relationship, or u jus plainly wanna keep avoiding that qns...?
= Trust the LuV, Hav faith in our destiny =
Our unfinished story.. a luv that's worth to persevere. I never stop thinking about us, missing u.. The loneliness is killing me, without u by my side. Time is passing every minute, every second.. Darling~ i still luv u... * take care yah~
Cupid Love[5:47 AM]
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Saturday, November 26, 2005
#~ MeMorieS of you & me ~#
Woo... today is the BB sharity proj. Darling's proj yo..
Haix, overslpt today till 6.50am when i'm supposed to meet meini @ 7am. Haha. Chiong all the way, the fastest time i get out of the house is ard.. 7.05am i think. If i taking bus with meini to sch, sure late.. so i tot of taking tat 170 service, cos abit faster. Diaox lo.. forget its saturday morning.. Checkpt sure jam. Sure enough, jam sia.. think for abt 25mins bah. Wah, then having no choice, have to alight at tat Kranji MRT stn to change to taxi lo. Hmm, 10 bucks sia.. hav to save money liao. Hahx.. Serve me right for overslept..
Luckily, i reached in time, slightly before meini's bus reaches.. Hahax.. Aftwhich, forms into 3 grps liao. Mine is Grp 3, with Meini, kesh, yuan jin, siyu and "QQ". Then xiao zhu in Grp 1, with eeling, wenling, aaron, wendy.. Our grp finished the last, but we got quality cos... we oso collected food items on the way. So come back with bags of food.. Fun tho =)
Aftwhich, we went Orchard to shop-shop.. Well, think the main activity we do is.. photo-taking session.. Hahax.. take here and dere, like tourist.. Interesting... ^^ Tot of asking xiao zhu along, cos he like nth to do, but didnt say out cos later if rejected, then MS again.. Hahx, so drop tat idea liao.
Darling~ wah.. today, i spot u 1st sia in the canteen. U and ur new hairstyle.. Hehex.. Noe wat? U look better in that. More fashion and handsome, cute~ Hehex.. Besides u look more refreshed and energized.. In other word.. oso attract more gals bah.. Hmm, competitive liao.. Darling~ u seem "high" today, in a happy mood bah.. So me oso ^^ influenced by u, remember? Heex..
Really happy and enjoyable today.. Darling~ missya lotz.. ** If still as before, will be 2 mths le**
= Never give up till the very end. Shall let desperate in turn to hope. = Jia You Wor ^^
Cupid Love[11:45 PM]
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Wednesday, November 23, 2005
#~ MeMorieS of you & me ~#
Darling~ darling, i really miss you... C u in MSN, wanna chat with u.. but i dunno how to start the conversation. Previously, u initial the chat by saying, hi.. but nowadays, u seem busy.. So didnt tok much le..
Darling, i dunno wat makes ur stand so firm, but i noe i'll never give up. Cos.. tats not me, i'll never give up easily, instead wait for u to accept me again.. I believe tats some reason y we get together, not jus of concidence.. Fate? Or, prehaps not so easy bah.. only aft we passed several obstacles.. r u willing to overcome them with me..? I noe it's not gonna be easy, but i'm determined to find the key to open ur frozen heart..
I didn't know until I [lost] you
The [love] we shared,
the sweetest memories;
Hold back the [tears] Keep it inside
You told me so if you should ever go
Matter of time [true] love will be unfold
And every word it fills my mind
And your [smile] it lingers,
it's just not getting easy
I just couldn't find a way to make it better
I [miss] you so much darling~, you know?
I don't care others said that
time is gonna heal the [pain]
I know it won't for me
Hmm…It won't, [not] for me...
Darling~ luvya as strong as ever..
Cupid Love[3:45 AM]
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Sunday, November 20, 2005
#~ MeMorieS of you & me ~#
Hmm... darling~ i miss you, i miss you so.. Y did u hav to go? Y can't u stay, i need u.. really need u leh.. can u hear tat? Without u, i'm not ok wor... Darling~ dunno y i luv u so... its jus the feelings bah.. Sry sry if i hav done anyth wrong, willing to change anyth for u.. Dun angry le hao mah?
R u happy today? Hmm.. disappointed tat tml u wont be gng Sentosa with us.. Nvm, cos think u having sth on.. So i oso didnt ask again le, cos later u reject, then me upset again..
Good nite le~ sweet dreamz.. Hmm.. can we meet in dream land? hee.. *bleh*
= I'll wait for u to accept me again =
Cupid Love[12:05 AM]
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Friday, November 18, 2005
#~ MeMorieS of you & me ~#
Hmm.. recalling one mth fr today, 17th of Oct, heartbroken & sorrow day.
One mth le.. since we break. Darling~ can u feel the pain i felt? Hav u ever regret abt ur decision? U intial the break, and on that day u not in a good mood to tok abt that. Thus, no matter how i wish to patch, u still insist on ur firm stand. Jus getting annoyed and irritated only. Is that fair to me? Nono.. No explaination, nth.. When i'm still lost and anxious abt u, u break these news to me. Jus felt like i sudden lost the whole world, only lonely in this big crowded places, having no place for me.
U wan me to be understanding, cos u being the president, will be busy thus not much time for me. I understand and didnt ask for more. U wan me to be patient, nxt yr when u pass down, u will hav more time with me le. Yes, i will wait patiently for the time to come. Once u said that tho we r jus together for few days, our luv grow deeper that u cant imagine how it will b like if we together for years.. Really happy to hear that. Sweet of u~ But these r past le... ... Yet, i still dunno wat went wrong, when the luv felt so strong..
Darling~ i tot i can let go, i tot i can treat u as frenx only, i tot i can oso treat as nth has happened. But in actual fact, i simply cant.. I dunno how u can do so, but i dunno how. U didnt teach me.. cos we didnt plan for this outcome.. The feelings grow stronger when i met u, u choose to ignore my presence, trying to avoid meeting each other, is it because we hav the same reason? .. cos cant really let go so easily as u said, u afraid that aft we get close again, patching again? So we choose to avoid any direct approach in this topic. Is that wat u really wan? I dunno wat had happen tat make u change ur mindset so fast, few days ago we were happily together at forever land, yet afterwhich break liao...
I really wanna noe.. darling~ no matter wat it is, i wanna hear fr bottom of ur heart. I noe u like to keep things to urself. Thanks for trusting me before, for telling me stuff which u usually keep in low profile..
Darling~ come back hao mah? I need u.. really.. tho i noe that u will only be happy with the person u really luv together. If u really no feelings le.. then i shant le... I noe action is louder than words.. give me time bah..
I'll wait for u, stay by ur side, whenever u need me (tho u wont say to me) i will be dere for u..
Cupid Love[11:52 PM]
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Tuesday, November 15, 2005
#~ MeMorieS of you & me ~#
Hmm.. ytd is certainly a happy day bah. Cos not so much of mood swing bah. Duno y but certainly wish everyday will be like tat. Heehee =)
Darling~ mixed feelings now.. I noe i'm wrong to keep living in the past. Frenx ard me kept wakie me up, i noe. Trying to reason me out. Hmm, but prehaps, i'm jus not determined bah. Prehaps, time is all i need. As time goes by, ..... many things can happen. May & may not... Hmm, prehaps i shld hav b in ur pt of view to understand certain things.
Hmm.. sometimes, when i'm lonely, my mind cant help but kept wondering abt. It'll then wonder to the history section. Past memories... then regret then i shld hav been betta to you, prehaps try to understand u and noe wat u thinking. But i mus say that 3 wks is actually quite short for me to noe u well. Esp for me.. the not very "xi xin" type thus i need longer time. I dun really take notice to small details. But i made a BIG mistake which i jus realised, it is all these small bits and pieces that make up u. I shld hav been more thoughtful..
Hm... i noe u hav ur own reasons to this outcome. I noe we oso didnt predict that we will hav this outcome. I noe that u oso dun wish to hav this outcome, neither do I. But it jus happens... Darling~ remember wat I say.. if we are together le, I'm willing to go thru anyth with u. Share ur troubles and worries, tho i may not b in for any use. At least i can b ur listener bah, where u can vent ur stress...
Cupid Love[10:25 AM]
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Saturday, November 12, 2005
#~ MeMorieS of you & me ~#
Hm.. Sudden blankout.. dunno wat to write.. cos many many things i wanna say abt.
Darling~ i missya deeply u noe... sometimes i will use my heart to call u.. telepathy bah jus hope it will reach u.. Hav u ever sense that? Several days since we last met at the COJ meeting. But it somehow didnt end happily, a few disagreement bah i guess. hmm..
I hav borrowed tat "Prince turned into Frog" VCD Part 1. Aft watching, i hav a strange feeling. U r like the Dang ou, the time when he had a car accident and lost his prev memory. He oso lost the serious and strict type of "shan jun hao" the prev him, GM of Senwell. Instead he became a more cheerful, easy gng guy. Hmm, when we r together, tats abt the same as Dang ou and Ye Tian Yu. The natural and comfortable cheerful couple. Dang ou can get serious easily and handles last min change in a wit. Very skillful indeed, noe a lot of stuff. Jus like u. Whereas me, the cheerful, happy-go-lucky type.
However, there's another accident when Dang ou was admitted to hospital and regained his prev memory. Therefore, he lost his memory when he was with Tian Yu. Jus pretend that nth had ever happened. That's the time when u initial a break with me... claimed that there wasnt any feelings in the 1st place. Darling~ do u noe how hurt i felt when i heard that... heartbroken, into many parts cant patch back till now.... If there r no feelings at all, y do we start in the 1st place? Since we hav been together, tho for 3wks only..sure there r memories bah? How can u jus behave like nth hav ever happen? U dun wanna hear me explain nor wanna tok abt this topic anymore.. Like being sentenced to death without pleading... How can u bear...? i really wanna hear u say.. i noe u dun wan hurt me more so instead jus wanna avoid. But i rather make clear abt my doubts before i can really let go... Listening to Jay ' hei she mao yi' wo de xin hao tong... hao tong wor.. u noe.. The three words which u used to say seems to disappear and gone forever le.. ..
= To give up someone i luv so deeply is miserable, do u noe? =
Darling~ honestly.. i did tried to let go and behave like u treat as nth happen before, jus remain as frenx. But i dunno y.. the memories kept lingering around when i saw u.. the pain i cant decribe in words.. Furthermore, even more hurtful by ur cold behaviour towards me.. Sometimes, u jus treat as i was invisible.. Feel like crying my heart out to u.. but cant.. wat u wan me to do? U tot me lots of things fr skating to bowling, but u nvr teach me how to handle such situation.. how will i noe? U jus merely say wanna b frenx.. No warning.. nth given before ur "request". Or prehaps, ur "cold period" of that one week is ur warning le. I sensed it, but jus believed that we will not b history. But i guess.. i was wrong...
I mus confessed that only when u left.. i realised how impt u r to me. I'm sorry.. will u accept? Prehaps i'm still engrossed in that sweet dreamx and dun wish to wakie yet bah.. If i hav a choice, i rather not. Trust me hao mah? To me, u r like my support pillar, without u i hav no wish to b the same me le. I wasnt happy any day aft tat. Cos, i lost u .. so thats nth which can cheer me le. I luv u jus the way u r. U said before u had low confidence in urself, thus low morale abt ur appearance. Darling~ silly u arh~ if i really luv u, do u think i will care abt ur appearance mah? All i noe and feel is ur thoughts and concern which really touched my heart. Nvr ever regret being with u, trust me k? Jus hope u wont oso... will u ever miss me aft we parted? I really really wanna noe..tho i'm afraid that the truth is not wat i wanna hear...
Darling~ all i wanna say is.. I luv u, and i promise to b by ur side in times of joy and sorrow. Will we ever be together again..like before? I noe u will leave me eventually, i noe all i wait and wished for will not ever come true.. but i still stubbornly hold on.. I'm sorry, i simply still cant let go...
Cupid Love[12:51 PM]
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Saturday, November 05, 2005
#~ MeMorieS of you & me ~#
Hmm.. times passes very fast. One blink and now is gng to b the 2nd wk of 2nD semester le..
During this 6 Wks holiday, many events happen... joy & Sorrow ..
OsO more involoved in LeO activities.. Ever since the I&I event..
25 Sept'05 is the most impt event of the yr, cos we r together le. [B]ing [H]ong & [S]ok [L]ing ^^
is the day u ask me tat long-awaited qns.. yes, i luvya .. tats my reply.. *blush*
Hmm.. i still remember is in the dawn of Sunday Morning. We r @ Pasir Ris Park, near beach area. That morning got the Children's Day Event @ Escape Theme Park.
Before that day, we had chalet at the Costa Sand Resort. I didnt bring my sandal, so i wore Andrew's . But it cut my feet, blister..pain.. The 1st thing i do is ask whether u had xtra slipper, and plaster. U loan me urs, and buy plaster for me.. Very happy tho =)
I requested to c the sunrise, but oops, sun rise in the West .. hahax.. but u still company me to the beach along with meini, ursula, aaron and shaun.
I still rememeber u helped me to take my food, or there may not b any left. Ur little concern touches my heart, shows ur care for me. Aft the whole event ended, left the little time for u & me. We went to play go-kart. Raced against each other. U won and very happy that u even won the person-in-charge. Aft the games, both very tired liao, cos the day b4 we didnt slp. Hahax, bcos of me, u stayed awake. Sry yah~ u still hav 2 drive me home.. Thanks, Darling~..
U sent me to the Wlds stn only as i requested tho u insisted me hm.. Then i didnt send u msg when i reached hm.. Cos i was so tired liao, aft bath me slpt liao, till abt evening bah.. Then a msg came, dear arh reached le mah? worried abt me cos i was like walking zombie hm.. *smile* very happy tho abit late ... i replied..
Nxt event is the Mid-autumn fest @ Villa Francis Home. Ben and U, the coordinators.. me the logistic as usual. Cos u busy, so i didnt much go find u. Instead is u, come find me.. hehex. U said me like very busy, no time for u, i replied: cos u busy so i jus wanna try 2 lessen ur job =) .. *joY* I still rememeber, tats once somebody fr SMU, or RC lah, a gal tho, asked u whether u chasing me. Haha. u looked at me and asked me instead. I smile and act blur. Hahax. Aftwhich we went WestMall Swensen to celebrate with the rest. Aft we part, u called. ^^ saying u miss me yah~ wanna chat with me.. haha... if only u companied me home lo...
Nxt event is the East Coast Park coaching the underprivileged children skating. Oh my~ i myself oso dunno how to skate sia.. Hahax. All i do is jus hold my rep. boy's hand, and encourage him to skate. In the End, he know how liao.. Then is some free time for the leaders themselves. My turn to learn skating. Hahax. Very scary sia. Me 1st time in my life wearing the blades. Finally manage to stand. As i was quite "good" with the coach, i requested a personal lesson. He taught me some tips tho. I kept holding his hands tight, cos i dun wanna let go. Cos.. i dunno how 2 contol yet. Haha. Finding u @ the same time. U came, and skate beside me. Wah, u pro sia can skate so well. Me leh~ aiyo~ Then i went on learning myself with u by my side, holding me. Haha. Sry yah~ cos u 2 fall twice. Pain mah? hehex..
Oh~ and oso saw wen song and his frenx @ dere. Then @ MaC saw Daryl gege and his gf.. Hahax... World so small.. *SweeT* u asked for my hand, i tot u wanna try rubbish so i say rubbish bin over dere. Hahax, u insisted. I opened my hand.. guess wat.. u gave me sea shells.. oh my~ sweet yah~ u collected the sea shells when u alone @ EC beach and gave me. Darling, very very romantic of u.. ^^ LuVya so much~~ Aft the event, we had dinner with Wenyou and her bf.
Memories lingering in my mind.... the times we had event together, the times alone together. The 1st time u sent me home is on one of the sunday bah. U didnt ask me where i worked on that day, and wanted 2 give me a surprise. Instead u went Westmall, cos u hav the feeling that i was there, tho me actually at Jurong Pt. Tell u the truth, me oso hav the instinct that u gonna pick me up, and worried that u gng WM instead.. Hahax. Telepathy bah~ Ard 10pm, msg came asked whether me ok le mah? I called, and u realised u went wrong place, jus replied that u somewhere dere and quickly drove to JP. I waited at that " waiting place" and msg u. Prehaps, is "ying cuo yang cha" , there r two taxi stand. Haha~ nth to say. But, really OverJoyed to noe u came.
The nxt day, i didnt expect u to come again. Cos is a Mon. U noe that me @ JP this time. Ard tat time, phone rang again. U said u came cos its raining heavily. Yes, indeed heavy rain when we stepped out. When i came down the escalator, u were dere waiting for me, with an umbrella. So sweet of u~ Tat journey back home is quite dangerous tho, cos is quite blur. Raining cats and dogs. But i feel safe, cos u by my side ^^ Very touched~~ cos u said that no one will ever believe u that u drove someone home in this heavy rain. Darling~ The rain stops when somewhere reached hm. Instead we went somewhere near my hse coastline. Hm.. shall i name it? ForEver LanD, tats it ^^ Hope u not to disappointed cos no stars tat time, but u did c the night view of JB bah. Hope u like tat place..cos we been there few times le =) Will u.. still go dere.. without me.. thinking back the days we had..? hmm...
Besides the event, we oso went out alone.. shopping, pool, bowling.. hahax... very enjoyable tho =) hmm.. i still remember the last time we went out is on 11 Oct' 05 --> to JB. Hmm.. prehaps on the journey bah, sth happen tat changes ur mindset on us. The LoSt-and-FoUnD event mah? or wat? ... hmm... really regret... if only.. if only we didnt go JB. Prehaps, we still together. Prehaps, u hav found out my childish, my naive, my silly... [ as wat ppl always say, cos u dunno each other u get together. But when u really understand someone, u part ] r we that case?
... the last time u sent me home is on Sunday oso, 9 Oct' 05. As usual, i didnt expect u to b dere. cos nxt day we meeting up liao, tho we 2days nvr see each other liao. But u came, and say cos u miss me, and had ice-cream together. I remember u said tat, b familiar with that place, cos u'll bring me dere quite often. Cos u like tat ice-cream shop, ur fav. Haha.. ur fav flavour is same as mine- hazelnut de~ Aft which, we went our ForEver Land again.. *JoY* Nxt day, me companied u in the aftnn, aftwhich u went for bowling competition le. Hmm.. everytime we part, aft some time, u'll call.. saying how much u miss me~ hahax.. very sweet tho.. *Ooo...*
Memories... these r the only memories we had together. We both stml de, so i wanna write down so that in future if i ever forget, i can still recall. * 17 Oct '05 breakup* Do u still remember..? DarLing~ sometimes, i really wanna ask.. ni hao hen xin o? All the things we do together, times together.. u got no feelings mah? How can u say break and let go so easily? Dun u ever regret?..
.. I mus confess that i CANT... i'm emotional person i noe. So i always put in my heart. So the more i put in, the worse pain i feel now. Alone in this world.. having no one to lean when i'm lonely. No one to tok to when i'm in need. Darling~ i need u... i'm sorry that i only realised how much i luv you only when u left me.. I shld hav noe tat early... If only... if only time can turn back.. Still luvya i guess~~
Lets find back and relight the sparks together and keep the passion escalate together ^^
Cupid Love[9:35 PM]
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